A site of nerdery, life, geekism, and monsters
Archive for May, 2009
someone call starbuck
May 28th
The ending may not have actually happened, but I’m not placing bets either way. This call was taken by a tech that I sit next to, and I only got to hear his half to start. I asked him to give me the other side.
“Thank you for calling the service desk, how can I help you?”
“Oh my god! The computer is telling me that I’m a robot or a virus! What do I do?”
“Ma’am, its OK. You are not a robot or a virus. Look….see, its just a website”
“But it said I may be a virus or a robot!”
“Google is More >
someone call starbuck
May 28th
The ending may not have actually happened, but I’m not placing bets either way. This call was taken by a tech that I sit next to, and I only got to hear his half to start. I asked him to give me the other side.
“Thank you for calling the service desk, how can I help you?”
“Oh my god! The computer is telling me that I’m a robot or a virus! What do I do?”
“Ma’am, its OK. You are not a robot or a virus. Look….see, its just a website”
“But it said I may be a virus or a robot!”
“Google is More >
house update
May 20th
So our house is now lookin’ pretty, although the many many projects to this point have also created other projects. Sooner or later (hopefully much later) the bathroom will need to be redone, the kitchen will be remodeled, and the front yard will be landscaped. Much like a horror movie, when you think you’ve killed the monster, it will return and will be much angrier.
You may remember the carpets. They made me so upset, I coined the term “kicked in the retinas by a colorblind donkey”, and those words should never have been put together in that order.
Now I can More >
May 14th
Can we all just agree that Nancy Pelosi is an idiot?
Either she is too dumb to understand the CIA briefing they gave her, or she wasn’t paying attention when they brought up waterboarding. Either way, not a good thing for the leader of the majority party.
“So Ms. Pelosi, we have the option of using waterboarding as an EIT and it has proven effective when we’ve employed this method….Ms. Pelosi?”
“Hang on one minute, I just got a text message from Susan Sarandon….’lol sue u make me laff’….ok, what was that you were saying?”
“I said that we’ve been using techniques that we’ve More >
arithmetic
May 13th
“How can I help you?”
“Well, its asking me to change my password, and I don’t want to. Every time this happens, I spend about 30 minutes fighting with it to choose a new password. I have one that nobody will guess, and I want to keep it.”
“What is your current password?”
“laUren57″
“You could make it laUren58 or laUren56, you know, just change one part of it”
(as realization that he’s wasted hours of his life sinks in) “……huh, I guess I could….” http://feeds.feedburner.com/ThisIsWhyYourHoldTimeIsSoLong
ripped from the headlines
May 12th
from a case log, and keep in mind this user has called multiple times with similar issues:
Asked client if she was right clicking, or left clicking.Client said she was clicking the right mouse button.Told the client to click the left mouse button.
Client is now able to send her order
Spend a few minutes explaining to client the different between Right and left clicking, and suggested because she is Right handed, that she always click with the left mouse button ( Index finger ) when trying to click on links or complete orders. http://feeds.feedburner.com/ThisIsWhyYourHoldTimeIsSoLong
so many wires
May 7th
Overheard:
“So I want you to find the network cable on the back of your computer….it should look kind of like a telephone cord but a little wider….yes, it might be black….ok, I think that was the power cord. Your computer is probably off right now? Plug it back in and press the power button….” http://feeds.feedburner.com/ThisIsWhyYourHoldTimeIsSoLong
2 out of 3 carnival midgets recommend it
May 4th
I don’t know why this amuses me so much, but when you type the word “safety” into Google, the suggested sites are as follows:There are about 23,000,000 websites related to the Safety Dance. Now don’t get me wrong, I think it is important for us all to be aware of the potential for injury whilst dancing, just not maybe 23 million websites important. That type of thing should be solely dedicated to Miley’s new hairstyle or something. http://feeds.feedburner.com/ThisIsWhyYourHoldTimeIsSoLong
anatomy is not my strongest subject
May 4th
Jeremy: Very productive morning thus far, actually. Made a 50+ slide lecture on oral contraceptives.Me: That’s an easy lecture: “You don’t make babies in your mouth, therefore oral contraceptives are a waste of money. Any questions?” End of lecture. http://feeds.feedburner.com/ThisIsWhyYourHoldTimeIsSoLong
